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AN AMERICAN GENTLEMAN.-TO MR. PUNCH.

IR,-The Morning Star publishes a most extraordinary correspondence, between MR COMMISSIONER HILL, Recorder of Birmingham, and the REV. EDWIN CHAPMAN, on the one part, and a personage oddly denominated SIR SAMUEL CUNARD on the other. From these premises it appears that an American lady, MRS. C. E. PUTNAM, with her son, MR. EDMUND T. PUTNAM, and party, consisting of a lady and gentleman, respectively named SMITH and CASSEY, having taken first class passenger tickets for England on board the steamer Europa, CAPTAIN LEICH, were, a few days before the steamer sailed, served with the following notice :

"British and North American Royal Mail Steam-packet Company. Office, 99, State Street, Boston, Oct. 27, 1859. "For your information, we desire to inform you that a separate table will be provided for yourself and party on board the Europa, hence to Liverpool, where everything will be furnished you that first cabin passengers are entitled to; the person who app ied for your tickets did not state the fact that the party were coloured, other ise we should have informed you. "Should this interfere with your expectations, please apply at this office at once, and we will refund the Respectfully,

passage-money.

"Mrs. E. Putnam and party, Salem."

"(Signed) E. C. and J. G. BATES.

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"During the whole voyage we were not allowed a seat at the table. And during the last few days of our voyage we were obliged to sit in the ladies' cabin by ourselves, and servants bring us food as if we were criminals, when we had conducted ourselves with the strictest propriety. The captain committed a great wrong in submitting to the dictation of an American agent. Yours, &c., "(Signed) C. E. PUTNAM."

"Now the above particulars, and more to the same purpose, were communicated by MR. M. D. HILL and MR. CHAPMAN to the party mysteriously entitled SIR SAMUEL CUNARD, together with the respectful expression of a hope that, as the chief proprietor of the American line of packets including the Europa, he would prevent the repetition by his agents of the

OUR FACETIOUS FRIENDS.

PUNCH has sometimes been found fault with both by ignorant and timid persons, for venturing to poke his fun at our near and dear allies (who might be held still dearer if they were not so expensive to us). Stupid people say the French don't understand a jest, while timid ones declare they are so thin skinned and so sensitive that they cannot take good humouredly a harmless laugh at their expense; and, as an element of enuity, one might as well propose to crack a rifle as a joke at them. How far away from truth are these absurd Britannic notions, may be shown by this brief extract from one of the few dozens of French pamphlets lately published, which by their friendly tone and truthfulness have by no means less astonished than they have delighted

us:

"It is absolutely essential to the existence of the British Empire that the entire class of peasants of Ireland should be maintained in a condition which renders them perfectly docile and easy to decimate when they grow too numerous, or not disposed to bring recruits to the army They who are of opinion that the English is the ba-est and most horrible tyranny which ever scandalised the earth will probably form the wish that her indispensable support, Ireland, shall be taken from her."

The statement that "the English is the basest and most horrible tyranny which ever scandalised the earth" is really, to our thinking, so exquisitely ludicrous that one might fancy that the force of funning could no further go, were it not for the still fuunier remark directly following it. But that Ireland should be viewed as really being England's "indispensable support" is an idea which is so flattering as well as so facetious, that we should almost feel inclined to give the writer an engagement did not the interests of our readers prohibit such

a course.

conduct of which they were guilty towards MRS. PUTNAM and her friends. To this communicaobtained the following reply:tion no answer was returned. A second appeal

"Bush-hill-House Edmonton, June 29, 1860. "Sir, I have received your letters of the 8th and 28th inst.

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discussing the subject matter of those letters, therefore I "I do not see that any advantage would result from must decline entering into any correspondence on the subject. "I am, Sir, your obedient servant, "S. CUNARD." The Rev. E. Chapman, Durdham Down, Bristol." "Surely the writer of the above letter, signing himself S. CUNARD, is plain SAMUEL. It is impossible that he can be "SIR" SAMUEL. To be in case to bear the title of SIR, he must needs be a British subject; whereas it is manifest that S. CUNARD is a regular Yankee. No Englishman could possibly be capable of such subserviency to the wicked and absurd antipathies of the American populace, as to permit, on board any vessel under his control, the continued perpetration of the infamous insolence which MRS. PUTNAM declares to have been practised on herself and her friends by the authorities of the Europa. Any SIR SAMUEL CUNARD would have written at once to MR. CHAPMAN, apologising for the base brutality of his servants, and promising to take care that no ship of his should ever again be disgraced by such atrocious truckling to the prejudices of American snobs. The author of the foregoing refusal to entertain the question of putting a stop to a system of outrages upon justice, humanity, freedom, and English civilisation, SAMUEL unadorned; SAMUEL, without a handle can only be one simply MR. SAMUEL CUNARD; to his name; SAMUEL, the genuine nephew and countryman of Uncle SAM. "Yours, &c.,

"STAR AND GARTER."

A Fly-Blow.

BUTCHER'S meat is high, and accordingly the working classes have very reasonably resolved to abstain from it. If, however, in consequence of this resolution, the butchers are prevented from selling their beef and mutton off their hands, and this hot weather continues, butchers' meat will soon get still higher.

THE STOOL THAT WAS NOT MEANT TO BE STOOD
UPON.

OUR PREMIER he made a Precedents' stool,
With three legs, as neat as could be,
Out of old HATSELL Wood, the workmanship good,
And the turning masterlie.

Then up came GLADSTONE, full of wrath,
Brimming o'er with a speech so fine,
"Let me mount this stool, the House to school,
And deliver this soul of mine."

"Now nay-now nay," quoth the PREMIER gay,
Thy speech thou may'st speak anor;

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But this stool, my friend, thou mayst not ascend, 'Tis not meant for standing on."

Then up and spake grim GLADSTONE,

And he smote the board till it rang"A stool with three legs, and none of 'em pegs Whereon a speech to hang!

"I leave you to sink-I leave you to swim, As pleases DISRAELI,

But the place where such cabinet-work is done,
Is no longer the Place for me."

Then up he rose, and shook his clothes,
And clapped the chamber-door-
Which as Ministere to that sely Peer
He never entered more!

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FINE TIMES FOR FARMERS.

You cats and dogs, which, till July,

It all this year did raain,

I wishes you at last good-bye,

The weather's turned to fine.

Cabbie. "Now THEN, SIR! JUMP IN. DRIVE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND FOR EIGHTEEN PENCE!"

Then in the pockets there's the gold,

The grain is in the barn;

There's last year's proddus all well sold,
In hand there's this un's carn:

And if we rapes abundance now the showers have sased to fall;
This time I spose we fellers shan't be rhuan'd arter all.

So now as wet gives place to dry,
And dark makes way for shine,
"Success to Farmun!" is the cry
We'll drink in chape French wine.
The twoast is what in strong old ale
We used to drink afore,

But now new-fangled slops prevail,
They brews good beer no more.

But push about the clarut, since the showers have sased to fall,'
And sing, the jolly farmers wun't be rhuan'd arter all.

Dark clouds consales the Zun no more,

He shines as bright as brass:

Zo now we zells our hay in store,

And cuts our crops of grass.

The sky is butcher's blue agen; the showers have sased to fall, We farmers bain't a gwaian to be rhuan'd arter all.

'Twas bad for cattle and for ship,

And lambs, you may suppose,
When every hedge wi' wet did drip;
But then bastes' valley rose;
And fodder was as high as mate;

Sitch times was never know'd.

Here zum on us was zellun whate

At fifteen pound a load!

But things must now come down, because the showers have sased to fall;

Yet still I hopes as how we shan't be rhuan'd arter all.

There's them as thirst o' gain betrays,

By ladun on 'um wrong,

But happy is the man, I says,

As doan't hold on too long.

I zold my stock at famine-rates;
Here's plenty now in view!

I hopes as I med say, my mates,
It is the same wi' you.

The crops is all fast thrivun now the showers have sased to fall;
We shan't, at laste not all on us, be rhuan'd arter all.

When harvest, feared for all the spring,'

A good un proves to be,

That there I calls the sart o' thing,

That's just the time for we!

A PROFESSIONAL PROTEUS WANTED.

THE advertisers daily grow more queer in their requirements, and by no means the least strange are those connected with the theatres, where novelty of any kind is always in request. We take the following, for instance, from the columns of the Era, which are constantly supplying something funny of this sort :

WANTED, for an ENTERTAINMENT, a Professional Gentleman of

Versatile Powers, to play with a Lady. A good figure and personal appearance indispensable. Age not over Thirty. Characters to be sustained:-A Young, and an Elderly Gentleman, a Modern Fop, a Frenchman, and a Drunken Character in Low Life. A fixed salary weekly.-Address, &c.

A gentleman must need have "powers" something more than "versatile" to make him able to comply with all these various requirements. Were nothing said about his "personal appearance,' the task might indeed be much more easy of accomplishment. But although it may be proper for him to be possessed of a "good figure" to enable him successfully to "play with a lady," it seems to us that this would not be an advantage to him when appearing as a "drunken character in low life," and he must indeed be a most skilful pantomimist to undertake the transformation scenes which seem to be required of him.

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BRITANNIA. "WHY, PHOEBUS, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? HERE'S ALL THE CORN SPOILING-TO SAY NOTHING OF THE STRAWBERRIES!"

A NEW SONG TO THE OLDEST TUNE AS IS. (See MR. CHAPPELL's History of Early English Music.)

SUMMER is ycomen in

Rather late, it's true

Groweth grain, and ceaseth rain,
And gloweth toilet new.

Salad groweth for cold lamb;

Volunteers are not wet through:

Flannel droppeth, great-coat stoppeth,
And Goloshes too!
Months two overdue,

The Summer's here!

THE ROYAL ACADEMY.

"MY DEAR PUNCH,

"THREADING my way through the mazes of flounce and crinoline which fill the R. A. Exhibition, I found myself one morning in the North Room.

"Poor MR. WILKINS, the Architect, to whose taste and skill we are indebted for the design of these halls, has been much abused for his pains, but I forgive him his feeble façade and his dreary little dome, his pepper-boxes and his pseudo-Greek portico-in short, all his mistakes-for inventing the North Room, that cool retreat from the crowd and bustle of the Exhibition where one can, at 9 A.M., look at a picture in comfort, and without prejudice-to corns.

is pretty, and the idea of 'Ebony' bearing apples has, at least, the merit of novelty.

"MR. ERWOOD's First Place deserves a better one on the Exhibition walls. It is exquisitely finished, down to the very dust-pan which the poor housemaid has laid aside for a few tearful moments before she begins her day's work.

"Love Knows no Sleep (531), by MR. W. WILLIAMS, represents a flirtation between a young lady at an open window who is slipping a letter into the hand of her lover as he leans through the casement. If Love knows no sleep, the fair creature in question appears well aware that, at least, her Mamma is dozing. As for the gent. in the Balmoral bonnet, there is no doubt that HE is tolerably wide awake.

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(541), The Outrage upon Sir John Coventry, affords MR. MAGUIRE a capital bit of melodramatic incident for illustration. Poor SIR JOHN appears hard pressed in the Sa sa encounter. He placed himself against the wall (so runs the story), and thus, though foes attacked him in front, he had bricks to back him. Two heavy villains are already disarmed, and SIR J. is laying about him bravely. It is a curious fact, that though COVENTRY was least likely of all to show the white feather, he is the only cavalier in the picture who wears one. "To criticise The Critics would be hardly fair, nor, if MR. EMMERSON chooses to paint from such models as are represented on his canvas (559), has any one a right to interfere. It would be violating the liberty of the subject, which in this instance, though a singularly ugly one, is treated with skill. Artists will not fail to appreciate the accidental repeat' of the puppy behind the chair in the spaniel on the carpet.

"Guilty or not Guilty? asks MR. HAYLLAR, àpropos of his picture (565), in which a fat little boy is seen standing by a Fortnum-andMasonic looking jar. Guilty, I suppose, of poaching on the home

"MR. G. D. LESLIE contributes two works, Matelda (578), and Meditation (588). The latter represents a young lady in a brown study and pink dress lying by a green pond. She has chosen a somewhat damp spot for her reflections. It is melancholy to think that such a close inspection of water lilies might be attended by-lumbago. The other picture (Matelda), is more interesting, and has its admirers, among whom is your humble servant.

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"Nor are the works exhibited in this little Sanctuary to be over-preserves. looked or despised as an insignificant part of the show. Let gentlemen console themselves who are condemned to be hung (I allude, of course, to their paintings) in the North Room. Here their friends can examine their canvas at leisure; and as for dignity, are not HUNT, PICKERSGILL, and RICHMOND, good company for any of us? The fact is, that crowds rush through the larger rooms to see A.'s famous Allegory, and B.'s grand Battle-piece, or struggle to get a peep at the exquisite portraits by DAUBNEY. Suppose this or that picture is Let artists take warning by the incident which forms the subject praised, let us say in The Connoisseur, or the Propylæum, well-of MR. HUGHES's picture (568), and keep their studios locked up. it naturally becomes popular, and the British Public elbows its way Young Hopeful is here earnestly engaged in laying 'high lights' up to it in admiration. It is the correct thing to do. I don't say on the nose of a lay figure, while his papa peeps round the corner, this out of spite, though my Coronation of Amalasuntha was rejected. apparently pleased with the experiment. Well-there is nothing like -I hope I'm above envy-but such is the case. When, on the other encouraging youthful genius, even when manifested through the hand, I see any one in the North Room straining his neck here or medium of Roman white. there, and anxiously turning over the leaves of his catalogue, I feel pretty sure he is looking for a friend's picture, or is guided by his own æsthetical instinct. And surely there is a sufficient variety in this room to suit all tastes, from the simple truth and grace expressed in MR. MORRIS's Voices from the Sea, to the dismal text of MR. STIRLING'S Revival Sermon. The former (537) is an English coast scene. A young wife and mother listens to her husband's farewell shout as his boat scuds out to sea. Her ruddy children play beside her, and one young rascal has run knee-deep into the water to catch the last sound of his father's voice. It is a pretty, unaffected subject, to which the painter has done justice; and-Oh, if MR. STIRLING had but chosen such a one, instead of depicting the horrors of a 'Revival,' we should not have had to look at

"A pastor anathematising his flock,

While Stiggins stands by in a dirty white stock, And rears a placard. Sitting under is seen A flunkey; his coat is of emerald green, And crimson his breeches. Significant leers This worthy bestows on a damsel in tears, With a polychromatic and Brummagem shawl. While a juvenile version of Samuel Hall Attacks (most unjustly, it must be confest,) His companion, attired in a bright yellow vest. A reporter, got up' in low comedy style, Is dotting down notes. An eccentric old file, Sits watching the preacher. Observe in the rear How the 'fruits' of the sermon begin to appear. There's a girl in hysterics, with terror dismayed, While an anxious M.D. makes a rush to her aid. Thus fanatical froth, flirting, fighting, and fainting, Form the subject of this-most remarkable painting.* "The title of Ivory and Ebony is given by MR. ERCOLE to (453) a picture representing a fair damsel in an unexceptionable brocaded dress, attended by a nigger, who carries a plate of fruit. The contrast * An ingenious friend of mine, the author of several very clever (and eminently unsuccessful) poems, has, at my request, just dashed off these lines to show you what might be done in the way of metrical critiques. Artists will be pleased to remember, that bis terms are moderate, and inclusive of beer. Pre-Raphaelite notices executed in Medieval type, and Royal Academicians waited upon at their own residences. Address, SCRIBLERUS, care of MR. CATNACH, &c.

"One would have expected MR. WHISTLER'S talents to have been developed on the flute rather than At the Piano (598). Nevertheless, the painting of that, title shows genius.The tone which he has produced from his piano is admirable, and he has struck on it a chord of colour which will I hope find an echo in his future works.

"The South Room is, as you know, chiefly devoted to the exhibition of Architectural designs, the critique on which I have no doubt has been so ably conducted by my eminent friend, MR. T. SQUARER, elsewhere, that further comment would be superfluous. There are, however, some portraits here to which I would willingly allude. It would be a pleasure to linger before the miniatures of MESSRS. WELLS and MOIRA, and note the grace and artistic skill in the water-colour portraits by MR. MOORE, but it is time to close my letter.

"As I descended from the R. A. Rooms, after looking at the thousand and ninety-sixth Work of Art there exhibited, I passed through the Condemned Cell-I mean the room devoted to rejected contributions. Alas! for the vanity of human hopes! There lay dear SMITH'S grand compositions, and the produce of poor BROWN's brains and paint-pot; and the heartless porter grinned as he looked down upon the débris. Old MASSICOT had just dropped in to fetch away his portraits, and indulging in some rather forcible and-and cursory remarks on the Establishment in Trafalgar Square, I regret to say, disparaged even the divine Art itself as an unprofitable occupation.

I wonder is it better that men should find their own level in this great struggle of life, or keep buoyed up to the last in the comfortable but delusive hope of ultimate success? What becomes of the thousands who are thrown down in the crowd, or the thousands who, seeing the blows, and buffets, and vexation, turn, and walk quietly away?

"Is there no sanctuary-no refuge for these unfortunates-the Great Disappointed?

"I think if I had ten, twenty, or say thirty thousand a-year, I would endow such an asylum. I would welcome them all. The briefless barrister; the painter who has no patron; the parson to whom no one will give a living; the doctor in search of practice; the author whose tragedy no manager will accept; captains who want promotion; governesses without a place what a pleasant little society we might have, and-and how soon we should get tired of each other! "Faithfully yours,

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"JACK EASEL."

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