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Such then were my hopes ; but, with sorrow, your Highness,
I'm forced to confess—be the cause what it will,
Our Beelzebub Chorus has gone off but ill.
The Treasury pitch-pipe of late is so various ;
At the York music meeting, pow think it precarious.
But one or two capital roarers we've had ;
And Huntingdon Maberly's yell was not bad.
Even Eld-2 allows we got on but so-so;
We must, please your Highness, recruit from below.
Excuse me, Great Sir- there's no time to be civil ;-
MR. ROGER DODSWORTH.
To the Editor of the Times. SIR, -- Living in a remote part of Scotland, and having but just heard of the wonderful resurrection of Mr. Roger Dodsworth from under an avalanche, where he had remained, bien frappé, it seems, for the last 166 years, I hasten to impartto you a few reflections on the subject.
LAUDATOR TEMPORIS ACTI.
To find thus a gentleman, frozen in the year
To serve for our times quite as well as the Peer ;-
Of our ancestors, such as we find it on shelves,
To shovel up one of those wise bucks themselves !
Let him learn nothing useful or new on the way;
And our Tories will hail him with Hear' and 'Hurra !
What a God-send to them-a good, obsolete man,
Who has never of Locke or Voltaire been a reader ;-
And the L-nsd-les and H-rtf-rds shall choose him for leader.
And deeply with thee will they sorrow, good men,
So altered, thou hardly canst know it again.
Such oceans of tears, thou wilt fancy that he
And is only now thawing, dear Roger, like thee.
As matters, both public and private, now go,
A good rich Millennium will come à propos.
Instead of thy bankrupt old City of Rags,
Sound bullion throughout, from the roof to the flags-
A celestial Cocaigne, on whose buttery shelves
As your saints seldom fail to take care of themselves !
Divine Squintifobus, who, placed within reach
Can cast, at the same time, a sly look at each ;-
May, even in our own times, a jubilee share,
And so often has failed, we began to despair.
For the man who must being the Millennium about;
1'A measure of wheat for a penny, and three 3 When Whiston presented to Prince Eugene measures of barley for a penny. - Rer. c. 6. the Essay in which he attempted to connect his
See the oration of this reverend gentleman, victories over the Turks with revelation, the where he describes the connubial joys of para: Prince is said to have replied that he was not dise, and paints the angels hovering around aware he had ever had the honour of being each happy fair.'
known to St. John.'
There's Faber, whose pious predictions have been
All belied, ere his book's first edition was out;
There was Counsellor Dobbs, too, an Irish M.P.,
Who discoursed on the subject with signal éclat,
A Millennium break out in the town of Armagh !!
There was also--but why should I burden my lay
With your Brotherses, Southcotts, and names less deserving,
To the last new Millennium of Orator Irv-ng ?
Go on, mighty man,--doom them all to the shelf
And, when next thou with Prophecy troublest thy sconce,
Art the Beast (chapter 4) that sees pine ways at once !
THE THREE DOCTORS. Dr. S--they as gloriously sleeps
With “No-Popery' scribes, on the
stalls. Though many great doctors there be, There are three that all Doctors o'er- Dr. Slop, upon subjects divine, top,-
Such bedlamite slaver lets drop, Dr. Eady, that famous M.D.,
That if Eady should take the mad line, Dr. S—they, and dear Doctor Slop. He'll be sure of a patient in Slop. The purger-the proser—the bard-
Seven millions of Papists, no less,
Dr. S-they attacks like a Turk ;? Dr. Eady writes puffs by the mile.
Attacks but his maid of all-work. 3 Dr. Slop, in no merit outdone By his scribbling or physicking Dr. S--they, for his grand attack, brother,
Both a laureate and senator is; Can dose us with stuff like the one,
poor Dr. Eady, alack, Ay, and doze us with stuff like the
Has been had up to Bow Street, for other.
his! Dr. Eady good company keeps And truly, the law does so blunder, With No-Popery'scribes on the That, though little blood has been walls;
1 Mr. Dobbs was a Member of the Irish Par their immediate allies (he says) every faction liament, and on all other subjects but the Mil. that is banded against the State, every dema Jennium a very sensible person. He chose gogue, every irreligious and seditious journalist, Armagh as the scene of the Millennium, on every open and every insidious enemy to Monaccount of the name Armageddon, mentioned in archy and to Christianity'. Revelation!
3 See the late accounts in the newspapers of 2 This Seraphic Doctor, in the preface to his the appearance of this gentleman at one of the last work (Vindicia Ecclesiæ Anglicana), is police offices, in consequence of an alleged assault pleased to anathematize not only all Catholics, upon his “ maid of all-work.' but all advocates of Catholics :- They have the
May probably suffer as, under For here lies one who ne'er preferred
The Chalking Act, known to be guilty. A Viscount to a Marquis yet.
Before him Beauty's rosiest girls ;
And Love's own sister for an Earl's. Should you ask me, to which of the three Did niggard Fate no peers afford, Great Doctors the preference should He took, of course, to peer's rela fall,
tions! As a matter of course, I agree And rather than not sport a lord, Dr. Eady must go to the wall.
Put up with even the last creations. But as S—they with laurels is crowned, And Slop with a wig and a tail is,
Even Irish names, could he but tag 'em Let Eady's bright temples be bound
With ‘Lord' and 'Duke,' were sweet With a swinging Corona Muralis !'l to call;
And, at a pinch, Lord Ballyraggum
Was better than no Lord at all. EPITAPH ON A TUFT-HUNTER.
Heaven grant him now some noblenook, LAMENT, lament, Sir Isaac Heard, For, rest his soul, he'd rather be Put mourning round thy page, De Genteely damned beside a Duke, brett,
Than saved in vulgar company.
OF THE ORANGEMEN OF IRELAND,
To the people of England, the humble Petition
Of Ireland's disconsolate Orangemen, showing-
That our jobs are all gone, and our noble selves going;
Of Ireland's seven millions of hot heads and hearts,
To keep us from murdering the other six parts ;
We humbly suggest there is nothing less true;
Are made by and for a particular few ;-
To see you, in England, such ardour evince,
And burned with most gusto, some hundred years since ;
1 A crown granted as a reward among the Romans to persons who performed any extraordinary exploits upon walls-such as scaling them, battering them, etc. No doubt, writing upon them, to the extent that Dr. Eady does, would equally establish a claim to the honour.
That we love to behold, while Old England grows faint,
Messrs Southey and Butler near coming to blows.
Ever truly and really pulled the devil's nose;
Whether Edwy intrigued with Elgiva's old mother?
Conclusions most apt for our hating each other.
Has now for some ages gone happily on,
One party in Trans, and the other in Con,
Of the said monosyllable, ravaged the lands,
Both the bodies and souls of the sticklers for Trans ;-..
For keeping us still in the same state of mind;
When still smaller syllables maddened mankind ;-
One's ncighbours and friends with, as con and trans now;
Cut the throats of all Christians who stickled for ou."
So often has helped us to play the game o'er,
And wait but the word to show sport, as before.
Which for all such diversions John Bull has to pay-
That to Orangemen's pockets 't will all find its way.
etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.
1 To such important discussions as these the per' was going on), he found the Turks, we are greater part of Dr. Southey's Vindiciæ Ecclesiæ told, laughing at the Christians for being Anglicanæ is devoted.
divided by two such insignificant particles.'. * Consubstantiation--the true reformed be- • The Arian controversy.-Before that time, lief; at least the belief of Luther, and, as Mos- says Hoo'ier, ‘in order to be a sound believing heim asserts, of Melancthon also.
Christian, men were not curious what syllables 3 When John of Ragusa went to Constanti. or particles of speech they used.' nople (at the time this dispute between 'ex' and