the good people of their native island, with an occasional octavo volume, to the great comfort and exultation of the gulls, and the proportional improvement of their own temporal concerns.

Though our expectations were somewhat disappointed by this method of proceeding, we have nevertheless derived much amusement from these Travels, and if the author be, as we suspect, a gentleman, whose name is familiar to the lovers of humor, he deserves to touch something more solid than the pension of moonshine, which Mr Faux so liberally bestowed on him, for his patriotic labours in tickling his countrymen at the expense of Mr Bull.

We proceed to give some account of the doings and sayings of our traveller. He sails in a British brig for Boston, on his way to New Orleans, which would not occur to every one as the most direct route. But he was probably of opinion with an emigrant of whom we recollect to have heard, that to hit somewhere upon the broadside of America, was as much as could come within the compass of reasonable expectation. Notwithstanding the favourable opinions, which he entertained concerning America, he finds, in the very outset, much that disgusts him with the state of society. The great proportion and cruel treatment of the slaves in Boston, excite the most distressing feelings in his mind, as indeed they must in that of any person, who has ever witnessed them. He is informed by Governor Hancock, of many instances of this barbarity, beside what he himself has occasion to observe, The weakness and credulity of the people, who swallow with avidity the absurd witch-stories of their most popular living author, the Rev. Cotton Mather, astonish him, although he was of course prepared for much ignorance and its concomitant, superstition.

From Boston our traveller crosses the Potomac to Charleston, South Carolina, where he has an opportunity of dining with Judge D, whom, by the way, he had lately observed in the street," amusing himself with the niggers.” He tells us that

The dinner was, in the main, good enough. That is to say, there was a plenty of things naturally good, but what was very remarkable, it was brought up in wooden dishes, out of which they all helped themselves with their fingers, knives and forks not being in use in America, except among a few English people. There was a very suspicious dish on the table, which they called terrapin soup, in which I observed what had exactly the appearance of the fingers and toes of little

negroes. I afterwards learned that this was exactly the case, and that terrapin is the cant name for black children, as papoose is for those of the Indians. During the desert, an unlucky slave happened to let fall a knife to which he was helping his mistress, who snatched it up in a great passion and gave him a deep gash in the face. I dropped my knife and fork in astonishment, but nobody else seemed to notice this horrible incident.

We have not room to notice many of the observations on this, or indeed any other city, through which the gentleman in gray pantaloons has occasion to pass in his way to New Orleans. We shall only endeavour to give something like a general sketch of his route, with a few of its more remarkable circumstances. From Charleston, he proceeds to Portsmouth, New Hampshire, in the "stage." We suspect here either an error of the press, or of some careless transcriber. We think it must have been originally written "coach," "mail coach,” or "stage coach;" since it is scarcely in character for our journalist to be guilty of a Yankee-ism so soon after his arrival. But let that pass. In the stage then, or the coach, he goes, with a driver, drunk of course, who is a member of Congress, judge, colonel, justice, deacon, constable, and jailer. During this jaunt, he is introduced to the little Frenchman, alluded to in the preface. It will be seen by the following extracts, that Monsieur himself had some notion for grumbling at the customs of the country, and truly we admit that his complaint was not without foundation.

"Diable!" exclaimed the little Frenchman in broken English; "these democrat yankees have as many offices as their citizen hogs have hind legs." Why, how many legs have our citizen hogs, as you call them, Monsieur?" replied the communicative passenger. "Why, eight at least," said the other, "or they could never furnish the millions of hams which I see every where. Ďiable! I have breakfasted upon ham-dined upon ham-and supped upon ham, every day since I arrived in this country. Yes, sir, it is certain your pigs must have at least eight hams a piece;" upon which he politely offered me a pinch of snuff, which I refused with cold dignity. If I know myself, I have no national prejudices; but I do hate Frenchmen.

He witnesses in Portsmouth the following shocking catastrophe.

It seems a fellow of the name of Ramsbottom, a man-milliner by trade, and a roaring patriot, had taken offence at a neighbour, whose name was Higginbottom, because his wife had attempted to cheapen a crimped tucker, and afterwards reported that he sold his articles much dearer than his rival man-milliner over the way, whose name was Winterbottom, and whose next door neighbour, one Oddy, was Winterbottom's particular friend. In the pure spirit of democracy, Ramsbottom

determined to dirk not only Higginbottom and his wife, and Winterbottom, and Oddy, and their wives; but all the young Higginbottoms, Winterbottoms, Oddys, and little Oddities. It was some years before Ramsbottom could get them all together, so as to make one job of it. At last he collected the whole party at his own house, to spend their Christmas eve, and determined to execute his diabolical purpose. It appears, however, from what followed, that he had previously changed his mind as to the dirking, probably because it was too much trouble, (for these democrats hate trouble above all things.) Just as they were up to the eyes in a Christmas pye, the explosion took place, which I had just heard, and the whole party, Ramsbottom, Higginbottom, Winterbottom, and Oddy, together with their wives, and all the little Ramsbottoms, Winterbottoms, Higginbottoms, Oddys, and Oddities, were all blown into such small atoms, that not a vestige of them was to be found. I saw their bodies afterwards, all terribly mangled and torn to pieces. Such is the intense and never-dying spirit of vengeance, generated by the turbulent spirit of democracy, that the desperado, Ramsbottom, it appears, did not scruple, like the republican Sampson of old, to pull down destruction on himself, that he might be revenged on

his enemies.

At Portsmouth our traveller accidentally discovers, that he is rather out of the direct route to New Orleans, and begins to entertain some suspicion that he has not yet reached Charleston, South Carolina. He accordingly retraces his steps, delaying his outset for one day, for the purpose of avoiding the Frenchman, whom he suspects of a design upon his purse. But fate decreed that his precaution should be vain. Being obliged to set out before daylight, for the greater convenience of highwaymen and pickpockets, he had no opportunity of reconnoitring his companions. While riding with his hands in his pockets, with the ingenious intention of baffling every furtive attempt, he tells us, that

A sudden jolt of the jarvie brought my head in full contact with the back of a passenger on the seat before me. 'Diable!' exclaimed a voice which seemed to be familiar to me, and then all was silent again. Not long after, there exploded a sneeze, which shook the whole vehicle. 'My G-d!' ejaculated I, I'm sure I've heard that sneeze before; it must be my little Frenchman!'-But there was no help for it now, and I determined to keep him at an awful distance.

The unusual and somewhat awkward posture already alluded to, being continued, even after daylight appeared, excited some remark among the inmates of the leathern conveniency.

'He must have his pockets full of guineas,' said the little Frenchman in a whisper, winking at the same time at the communicative traveller. I understood all this perfectly, and when we stopped to dine, managed to exhibit a neat pair of hair triggers to these two worthies, who exchanged very significant looks thereupon. It won't do,' observed one to the other, in a desponding tone.

The hair triggers do good service. The following night he is near vacating half a dozen offices, civil, military, and religious, by "letting fly" at the driver abovementioned, as he is groping his way to the kitchen fire, by which our hero had undauntedly stood guard, during the whole night, over himself and baggage, with the "barkers" ready cocked and primed. Luckily coachy dodged, like a king-bird, at the flash, and the matter was hushed up by a pint of whiskey.

Having arrived again in safety at Boston, and staid three days to give the Frenchman and the banditti a fair start, he once more sets forward in the " stage," and pursues his jour ney through the states of Ohio, Alabama, and Connecticut. In this last state, in "the very centre," as he observes, "of steady habits," he is thus assaulted.

Although it was Sunday, (a sufficient reason for deterring any christian highwayman), we were stopped by a footpad, who demanded money with as little compunction as a he-wolf. Upon my showing my pistols, however, he sheered off, and the driver whipping up his horses at the moment, we luckily escaped this time. The incident of a single footpad attempting thus to rob a whole stage load of people, furnishes another proof of the fact, that stage-drivers and stage-owners, not to say a majority of stage-passengers, are accomplices of these bands of robbers. Had it not been for my pistols, we should all have been robbed to a certainty, and most probably the rest of the passengers would have shared my spoils. What exhibits the turbulence and impious spirit of democracy in all its turpitude, is the fact, that the driver, after getting fairly out of sight, turned round to the passengers with a grin, and exclaimed, 'I guess I've distanced the deacon.' So that this footpad was one of the pillars of the church!

"What must be the priest," might our traveller exclaim, "where a monkey is the god? What must be the congregation of a church, when the heads of it are footpads, and what must be the dissolute habits of a country, when the steady ones are Sabbath-breaking and highway robbery ?" This incident, to speak more seriously, is such a one as might easily have happened to an Englishman in Massachusetts, if not in Connecticut, a few years since, and we wonder that a similar story has never figured, with appropriate remarks, on the pages of those amusing writers, whom we mentioned, about the commencement of this article, and who are evidently much better acquainted with the nature of tithes, than of tithingmen.

But we are losing sight of our unfortunate hero, whom we shall now again permit to tell his own story, taking the liberty to omit a few sentences, which we think less interesting.

About five in the afternoon we arrived at Bellows Falls, at the mouth of the Ohio, where I embarked in the steam-boat for New York. These steam-boats, all the world knows, were invented by Isaac Watts, who wrote the book of psalms. Yet the spirit of democra cy, as usual, has claimed the honour for one Moulton, or Fulton, I forget which; although it is a notorious fact, that Isaac Watts died before Fulton was born. This settles the question. But there is no stopping the mouth of a genuine democrat."

* * *

While sitting in a state of indolent and contemptuous abstraction, with my back to as many of the company as possible, I was roused by a sneeze, that I could have sworn to in any part of the world. "It is the cd little Frenchman! Here's Monsieur Tonson come again!" I would as soon have heard the last trumpet as this infernal explosion. In a few minutes he espied me, and coming up with the most provoking expression of old acquaintanceship, offered me a pinch of snuff-"Ah! Monsieur, I am happy! Diable!-my friend and I thought we had lost our agreeable companion. *** You don't know how we have missed your agreeable society. Diable! we have not had a good laugh since we parted. *

* *

Towards evening the boat stopped at a place called the city of Annapolis. *** As we approached the wharf, I was standing among a coil of ropes, with my back towards the great city, when one of those sticklers for equality, in a red flannel shirt came up and desired me to move out of the way. The fellow was civil enough, for that matter, but I only answered his impertinent intrusion with a look of withering contempt.-Upon this, he gathered a part of the rope in coils, in his right hand, and when we were ten or a dozen yards from the wharf, threw it with all his force, with a design to knock a person down, who stood there. But the chap was too dexterous for him, and caught the end of the rope in his hands, which he immediately fastened to a post. The whole brunt of this Yankee joke fell upon me, for my feet being entangled in the end of the rope thus thrown, it tripped up my heels and laid me sprawling on the deck. The little Frenchman officiously helped me up, and offered me a pinch of snuff, by way of comfort; but as for the democratic gentry, they seemed rather to enjoy the thing, and if the truth was known, I dare say were at the bottom of the joke.

On the following night the grand attempt, as our author supposes, was made on his person and property by the artful Frenchman; but in vain. Neither the hair-triggers nor their master were asleep, and Monsieur narrowly escaped with his life. The man of snuff and compliments endeavours to explain the mistake which occasioned the catastrophe, but Mr Bull feels satisfied that nothing but powder and ball saved him from murder and robbery.

Having thus far accompanied our traveller, we begin to perceive, that our limits will not allow such close attendance to the time of his mysterious disappearance. We can only notice a few things, which occurred to us as most remarkable. Among these, is the following account of the Indian summer.