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ufage he has met from your illuftrious fociety. Even you, who ought to have efpous'd the caufe of an opprefs'd brother, have, like a profefs'd enemy, publish'd fome things to his disadvantage. If you go on thus, you have not the good of your community at heart; for you'll hinder feveral military heroes from inlifting themselves into your fociety, who might defend the members of it against all oppofition by force of arms; which is ftronger, and therefore a.. better argument, than can be produc'd in your journal. If upon mature deliberation you fhall think fit to confult the interest of your fociety, and to alter conduct; I myyour felf will write a play against the latter end of this month; and contemn all critics, aided by your journal, and a file of grenadiers.


I am yours eternally,


T the late trial of Mr. PETER NOAKES for the murder of. Mr. WILLIAM TURNER; that celebrated actor Mr. WILLIAM PENKETHMAN was produc'd as a witnefs in favour of the prifoner. On which tragical occafion, he deliver'd his teftimony in a moft furprizingly proper manner; performing at once the parts of a good witness, a good actor, and a good poet, To relate the common occurrences of life in the lofty ftrains of poetry, is extremely, difficult; but to do this extempore, is really wonderful. To act a part well at the theatre in the OLD BAILY; before fuch fevere judges, and fo numerous and polite an audience, and to come off with applaufe, is a very great thing; but it is still greater, to bring of a friend.-----As all these circumftances concur to raise Mr. PENKETHMAN's reputation; the fociety is forry to observe, that our learned brother the hiftoriographer of the OLD BAILY has not done him juftice; having printed that fine fpeech of his in a profaic manner, which is moft fublime blank verfe. As fuch it is therefore here republifh'd, in a poetical manner, but without the change of one word; in order to tranfmit to pofterity an illuftrious evidence of a great genious for poetry, and. of a great act of friendship.


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N THURSDAY night, or rather FRIDAY morning, "Twixt two and three, the prisoner and deceased, Rack punch were drinking at the RUMMER tavern. IN DRURY-LANE for then I found 'em there, And fociable they feem'd, and drank, and talk'd Like friends, 'till watchman cry'd, paft four a clock. The reckoning was a crown, NOAKES paid it all. From thence we rambled to KING's coffee-house, In COVENT-GARDEN. Ale and orange there We drank and ftill they cordial friends appear'd.-They told me, that they had been ferenading Some ladies, but they did not tell me who. And what (faid they) is your opinion, fir, Of fuch diverfion? I affur'd 'em that I was not fond of catterwauling frolicks... At five I left 'em, and return'd at fix, And found 'em ftill together friendly. 'Twas after seven when the deceas'd arose, And afk'd the prisoner if he would go with him.. But he refus'd to go: then the deceased Bade him good morrow, and went out alone. No, fir, I did not take him to be mad,... But rather thought he was a little filly. For he would laugh at every thing that pafs'd, At every word was fpoke, tho' nothing merry, Not fit to raise a smile; the meerest trifle Imaginable wou'd fet him on the twitter.-----When he was gone, I importun'd the prisoner To cross the water, with me, and two more. Who were in company, to spend the day In merriment, (for I had then no knowledge, That I fhould at the theatre be wanted) The prifonen gave confent, we all agreed, And down SOUTHAMPTON-STREET we took our way:

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A fervant to the theatre by chance.

We met; his bufinefs was at tavern doors,

And city gates the play-house bills to fix.
Iview'd his bills, and found, that very night.

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A part

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A part appointed was for me to act,
And by his royal highness's command.
Our journey then was ftopp'd; and to the RUMMER
In DRURY-LANE we all return'd at nine;
But did not tarry, for they had no fire.
We to the play-houfe went, and breakfasted,
And after ten we parted.

Grubftreet Journal, No 111.

RAMUS, lately acted by fome Young GENTLE-


Who fo long have lorded at the bar,


Still the great champion of the goofe-quill war;
Who, when a learned quotation would come pat in,
Could fill the jury's gaping mouths with latin;
To all my jargon now muft quit pretence,
Nor fpeak one word, forfooth, but fimple fenfe.
In ann. quart. GEORG. fecund. 'tis here decreed,
That lawyers each indenture, bond, and deed,
In plain pure
ENGLISH only write or read
In plain pure ENGLISH alloh, confcience! confcience!
Why downright fenfe in law is downright nonfenfe.
Dame juftice fure no longer will be blind,,
If jury-men pretend their eyes to find.
Shall to each quorum-fquire, juft taught to fee,
In wit and learning think to rival me?
Have I, for this, fuch folio's read, and wrote;
Made this poor head, with weighty volumns fraught,
Plunge through the vast profundity of thought?
Labour'd in terms abftrufe t' amafe the nation;
Sought for learn'd nonfenfe thro' each rank and station;
And after all that fenfe fhould come in fashion?

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But ah! what makes yon pulpit heroes fneer?
They think 'tis now their turn to domineer.
What! then this anti-lawyer combination,
Was brought about by clergy instigation.
And here fome wife-acres among 'em fay,
Lawyers fhould plead as cheap as parfons pray;
Because by your new-fangled reformation
The POPE's old MUMPSIMUS has loft his ftation,
And priests no more have power to gull the nation.
Pray, firs, what's that to us? Who ever faw
Religion made a precedent in law?
Muft pulpit maxims then keep barristers in awe ?
But, hold, don't think your victory compleat;
The act, you know, is not in force as yet.
If any therefore cloath your brows in terrors,
I'll plague 'em with appeals and writs of errors.
Dare not to frown then (if you do), th' event is,
I'll prove
each mother's fon non compos mentis.



Grubftreet Journal, No 21. POEMS, &c. omitted.


HEN fickness reigns, and sharp diseases fpread,
Phyficians thrive by living, and by dead.
When crimes encrease, if little villains fwing,
Or great efcape, GRUBEAN authors fing.
Of those the facts, the fortune, or the fate,
In lewd, gay, difmal numbers, these relate.

The pains our bodies from disease endure,
By art, or chance, phyficians often cure.
Of vice, the minds difeafe, the fiercer rage,
Thefe fcribbling quaks inflame, but ne'er affwage.
If rapes, or lewd intrigues amufe the town;
Joyful they feize thefe fubjects for their own.
In profe, or verfe, infpir'd with wine, or ale,
In phrase obscene they tell the nafty tale.
Sad, merry, wretched, fhort-liv'd mortals they;
Their works and felves forgotten in a day.

Thus, where by chance fome filthy ordure lies,
A fwarm of blind, light, lean, and hungry flies,
Warn'd by the folar rays, and buzzing round,
Transported at their own harmonious found,
Feed on the fragrant heap with vaft delight,
Luxurious all the day, then die at night.



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