But what's "so," what's fixed, ere may one stop? Nowhere! The cheating's nursed Where Out of the lying, softly and surely spun To just your length, sir! I'd stop soon enough: But you're for progress. "All old, nothing new? "Only the usual talking through the mouth, "Or writing by the hand? I own, I thought This would develop, grow demonstrable, "Make doubt absurd, give figures we might see, "Flowers we might touch. There's no one doubts you, Sludge! "You dream the dreams, you see the spiritual sights, "The speeches come in your head, beyond dispute. Still, for the sceptics' sake, to stop all mouths, "We want some outward manifestation!-well, "The Pennsylvanians gained such; why not Sludge? "He may improve with time!" Ay, that he may! He sees his lot: there's no avoiding fate. 'Tis a trifle at first. "Eh, David? Did you hear? "You jogged the table, your foot caused the squeak, "This time you're... joking, are you not, my boy?" N-n-no!"-and I'm done for, bought and sold henceforth. The old good easy jog-trot way, the... eh? Acting, or improvising, make-believe, Surely not downright cheatery,—any how, 'Tis done with and my lot cast; Cheat's my name: The fatal dash of brandy in your tea Has settled what you 'll have the souchong's smack: The caddy gives way to the dram-bottle. Then, it's so cruel easy! Oh, those tricks That can't be tricks, those feats by sleight of hand, Clearly no common conjuror's!-no indeed! To people untaught the trade: have you seen glass blown, Pipes pierced? Why, just this biscuit that I chip, To the oven? Try and do it! Take my word, Now, lights on table again! I've done my part, Well, Judge Humgruffin, what's your verdict, sir? 'You, hardest head in the United States, Did you detect a cheat here? Wait! Let's see! Just an experiment first, for candour's sake! "I'll try and cheat you, Judge! The table tilts: "Is it I that move it? Write! I'll press your hand: Cry when I push, or guide your pencil, Judge!" Sludge still triumphant! "That a rap, indeed? "That, the real writing? Very like a whale! "Then, if, sir you-a most distinguished man, And, were the Judge not here, I'd say,... no matter! 'Well, sir, if you fail, you can't take us in,"There's little fear that Sludge will!" Won't he, ma'am? But what if our distinguished host, like Sludge, Eh? That's a capital point, ma'am: Sludge begins The tiny hand made feel for yours once more, But now, such causes fail of such effects, All's changed,—the little voice begins afresh, ... And touch the truth. "Tests? Didn't the creature tell "Its nurse's name, and say it lived six years, "And rode a rocking-horse? Enough of tests! "Sludge never could learn that!" He could not, eh? You compliment him. "Could not?" Speak for your self! I'd like to know the man I ever saw Once,-never mind where, how, why, when,-once saw, Of whom I do not keep some matter in mind Nor find one smut has settled on your nose, What someone was, somewhere, somewhen, some why? You don't tell folk-"See what has stuck to me! "Thought to have married Miggs, missed him, hit you!" Do you, sir, though you see him twice a-week? "No," you reply, "what use retailing it? Why should I?" But, you see, one day you should, Because one day there's much use,-when this fact Brings you the Judge upon both gouty knees Before the supernatural; proves that Sludge Knows, as you say, a thing he "could not" know: Will not Sludge thenceforth keep an outstretched face The way the wind drives? "Could not!" Look you now, I'll tell you a story! There's a whiskered chap, A foreigner, that teaches music here And gets his bread,-knowing no better way: Was a hunchback cobbler, sat, stitched soles and sang, And to what street. His trade was, throwing thus And when 't was crusted o'er with creatures-slick, Once the imposture plunged its proper depth "Sir, did that youth confess he had cheated me, "Nor lion, nor lamb: 'tis the cat's nature, sir! Why not the dog's? Ask God, who made them beasts! "D'ye think the sound, the nicely-balanced man (Like me"-aside)-"like you yourself," (aloud) "He's stuff to make a 'medium'? Bless your soul, 'Tis these hysteric, hybrid half-and-halfs, Equivocal, worthless vermin yield the fire! We take such as we find them, 'ware their tricks, "Wanting their service. Sir, Sludge took in "How, I can't say, not being there to watch: "He was tried, was tempted by your easiness,"He did not take in me!" you Thank you for Sludge! |