No-never was known in this riotous sphere
Such a breach of the peace as their singing, my dear
So bad, too, you'd swear that the God of both arts,
Of Music and Physic, had taken a frolic
For setting a loud fit of asthma in parts,

And composing a fine rumbling bass to a cholic!

But, the dancing-ah! parlez-moi, DOLLY, de çaThere, indeed, is a treat that charms all but Papa. Such beauty-such grace-oh ye sylphs of ro

mance!

Here DANIEL, in pantomime,' bids bold defiance
To NEBUCHADNEZZAR and all his stuff'd lions,
While pretty young Israelites dance round the
Prophet,

In very thin clothing, and but little of it ;-
Here BÉGRAND, who shines in this scriptural path,
As the lovely SUZANNA, without ev'n a relic
Of drapery round her, comes out of the bath

In a manner that, BoB says, is quite Eve-angelic!
But in short, dear, 'twould take me a month to recite
All the exquisite places we're at, day and night;
And, besides, ere I finish, I think you'll be glad
Just to hear one delightful adventure I've had.

doubt

That her steps are of light, that her home is the air, And she only par complaisance touches the ground.

And when BIGOTTINI in PSYCHÉ dishevels

Her black flowing hair, and by dæmons is driven, Oh! who does not envy those rude little devils,

That hold her and hug her, and keep her from heaven?

Then, the music-so softly its cadences die,
So divinely-oh, DOLLY! between you and I,
It's as well for my peace that there's nobody nigh
To make love to me then-you've a soul, and can
judge

From a lighted pavilion, high up in the air,

And rattle you down, DoLL-you hardly know where.

These vehicles, mind me, in which you go through This delightfully dangerous journey, hold two. Some cavalier asks, with humility, whether

You'll venture down with him-you smile-'tis a match;

In an instant you're seated, and down both together Go thund'ring, as if you went post to old scratch ! Well, it was but last night, as I stood and remark'd On the looks and odd ways of the girls who enbark'd,

The next place (which BOBBY has near lost his heart in)

They call it the Play-house-I think-of St. Mar

tin

Quite charming-and very religious-what folly To say that the French are not pious, dear DOLLY, When here one beholds, so correctly and rightly, The Testament turn'd into melo-drames nightly; And, doubtless, so fond they're of scriptural facts, They will soon get the Pentateuch up in five acts.

1 The Théâtre de la Porte St.-Martin, which was built when the Opera House in the Palais Royal was burnt down, | in 1781.-A few days after this dreadful fire, which lasted more than a week, and in which several persons perished, the Parisian élégantes displayed flame-colored dresses, "couleur de feu d'Opéra !"-Dulaure, Curiosités de Paris.

2 "The old Testament," says the theatrical Critic in the Gazette de France, " is a mine of gold for the managers of our small play-houses. A multitude crowd round the Théâtre de la Gaieté every evening to see the Passage of the Red Sea." In the play-bill of one of these sacred melo-drames at Vienna, we find "The Voice of G-d, by M. Schwartz."

3 A piece very popular last year, called "Daniel, ou La Fosse aux Lions." The following scene will give an idea of

fright,

That there came up-imagine, dear DOLL, if you

can

A fine sallow, sublime, sort of Werter-faced man, With mustachios that gave (what we read of so oft) The dear Corsair expression, half savage, half

soft,

As hyænas in love may be fancied to look, or
A something between ABELARD and old BLUCHER!
Up he came, DOLL, to me, and, uncov'ring his
head,

(Rather bald, but so warlike!) in bad English said,

the daring sublimity of these Scriptural pantomimes. "Scène 20.-La fournaise devient un berceau de nuages azures, au fond duquel est un groupe de nuages plus lumineux, et au milieu Jehovah' au centre d'un cercle de rayons brillans, qui annonce la présence de l'E'ternel."

4 Madame Bégrand, a finely-formed woman, who acts in "Susanna and the Elders,"-"L'Amour et la Folie," &c., &c.

The Promenades Aériennes, or French MountainsSee a description of this singular and fantastic place of amusement in a pamphlet, truly worthy of it, by “F. F. Cotterel, Médecin, Docteur de la Faculté de Paris," &c., &e. • According to Dr. Cotterel the cars go at the rate of fortyeight miles an hour.

467

good

Just for von littel course"-though I scarce understood

What he wish'd me to do, I said, thank him, I would. Off we set-and, though faith, dear, I hardly knew whether

My head or my heels were the uppermost then, For 'twas like heav'n and earth, DOLLY, coming together,

Yet, spite of the danger, we dared it again. And oh as I gazed on the features and air

Of the man, who for me all this peril defied, I could fancy almost he and I were a pair

Of unhappy young lovers, who thus, side by side, Were taking, instead of rope, pistol, or dagger, a Desperate dash down the falls of Niagara!

LETTER VI

YOURS of the 12th received just nowThanks for the hint, my trusty brother! 'Tis truly pleasing to see how

We, FUDGES, stand by one another. But never fear-I know my chap, And he knows me too-verbum sap. My Lord and I are kindred spirits, Like in our ways as two young ferrets; Both fashion'd, as that supple race is, To twist into all sorts of places ;Creatures lengthy, lean, and hungering, Fond of blood and burrow-mongering.

REYNOLDS and I—(you know TOM REYNOLDS

Drinks his claret, keeps his chaise-
Lucky the dog that first unkennels
Traitors and Luddites now-a-days;
Or who can help to bag a few,

When S-D-TH wants a death or two ;)
REYNOLDS and I, and some few more,

All men, like us, of information,
Friends, whom his Lordship keeps in store,
As under-saviours of the nation'-
Have form'd a Club this season, where
His Lordship sometimes takes the chair,
And gives us many a bright oration
In praise of our sublime vocation;
Tracing it up to great King MIDAS,
Who, though in fable typified as
A royal Ass, by grace divine
And right of ears, most asinine,
Was yet no more, in fact historical,

Than an exceeding well-bred tyrant;
And these, his ears, but allegorical,

Meaning Informers, kept at high rent❞— Gem'men, who touch'd the Treasury glist'ners, Like us, for being trusty list'ners; And picking up each tale and fragment, For royal MIDAS's Green Bag meant. "And wherefore," said this best of Peers, "Should not the R-G-T too have ears, "To reach as far, as long and wide as "Those of his model, good King MIDAS?" This speech was thought extremely good, And (rare for him) was understoodInstant we drank "The R-G—T's Ears,” With three times three illustrious cheers,

Which made the room resound like thunder"The R-G-T's Ears, and may he ne'er "From foolish shame, like MIDAS, wear

"Old paltry wigs to keep them under !"
This touch at our old friends, the Whigs,
Made us as merry all as grigs.
In short, (I'll thank you not to mention
These things again,) we get on gayly;
And, thanks to pension and Suspension,
Our little Club increases daily.

1 Lord C.'s tribute to the character of his friend, Mr. Reynolds, will long be remembered with equal credit to both.

2 This interpretation of the fable of Midas's ears seems the most probable of any, and is thus stated in Hoffmann:"Hâc allegoriâ significatum, Midam, utpote tyrannum, subauscultatores dimittere solitum, per quos, quæcunque per omnem regionem vel fierent, vel dicerentur, cognosceret, nimirum illis utens aurium vice."

3 Brossette, in a note on this line of Boileau,
"Midas, le Roi Midas, a des ore lles d'Ane,"

tells us, that " M. Perrault le Médecin voulut faire à notre auteur un crime d'état de ce vers, comme d'une maligne allusion au Roi." I trust, however, that no one will suspect the line in the text of any such indecorous allusion.

CASTLES, and OLIVER, and such,
Who don't as yet full salary touch,
Nor keep their chaise and pair, nor buy
Houses and lands, like Toм and I,
Of course don't rank with us, salvators,"
But merely serve the Club as waiters.
Like Knights, too, we've our collar days,
(For us, I own, an awkward phrase,)
When, in our new costume adorn'd,—
The R-G-T's buff-and-blue coats turn'd-
We have the honor to give dinners
To the chief Rats in upper stations;
Your WYS, VNS,-half-fledged sin-

ners,

Who shame us by their imitations;
Who turn, 'tis true-but what of that?
Give me the useful peaching Rat;

Not things as mute as Punch, when kught,
Whose wooden heads are all they've brought;
Who, false enough to shirk their friends,
But too faint-hearted to betray,
Are, after all their twists and bends,
But souls in Limbo, damn'd half way.
No, no, we nobler vermin are
A genus useful as we're rare;
'Midst all the things miraculous

Of which your natural histories brag,
The rarest must be Rats like us,

Who let the cat out of the bag.
Yet still these Tyros in the cause
Deserve, I own, no small applause;
And they're by us received and treated
With all due honors-only seated
In th' inverse scale of their reward,
The merely promised next my Lord;
Small pensions then, and so on, down,

Rat after rat, they graduate
Through job, red ribbon, and silk gown,

To Chanc'llorship and Marquisate.
This serves to nurse the ratting spirit;
The less the bribe the more the merit.

Our music's good, you may be sure;
My Lord, you know, 's an amateur-

4 It was not under wigs, but tiaras, that King Midas endeavored to conceal these appendages:

Tempora purpureis tentat velare tiaris.-OVID. The Noble Giver of the toast, however, had evidently, with his usual clearness, confounded King Midas, Mr. Liston, and the Pe R-g-t together.

Mr. Fudge and his friends ought i go by this nameas the man, who, some years since, saved the late Right Hon. George Rose from drowning, was ever after called Salvator Rosa.

• This intimacy between the Rats and Informers is just as it should be-"verè dulce sodalitium."

7 His Lordship, during one of the busiest periods of his

Takes every part with perfect case,

Though to the Base by nature suited; And, form'd for all, as best may please, For whips and bolts, or chords and keys, Turns from his victims to his glees,

And has them both well executed.1 H- T-D, who, though no Rat himself, Delights in all such liberal arts, Drinks largely to the House of Guelph,

And superintends the Corni parts. While C-NN-G, who'd be first by choice, Consents to take an under voice;

And GR-v-s, who well that signal knows, Watches the Volti subitos.

In short, as I've already hinted,
We take, of late, prodigiously;
But as our Club is somewhat stinted

For Gentlemen, like Tom and me,
We'll take it kind if you'll provide
A few Squireens from t'other side ;-
Some of those loyal, cunning elves,

(We often tell the tale with laughter,) Who used to hide the pikes themselves,

Then hang the fools who found them after, I doubt not you could find us, too, Some Orange Parsons that might do ; Among the rest, we've heard of cne, The Reverend-something-HAMILTON, Who stuff'd a figure of himself

(Delicious thought!) and had it shot at, To bring some Papists to the shelf,

That couldn't otherwise be got at-
If he'll but join th' Association,
We'll vote him in by acclamation.

And now, my brother, guide, and friend,
This somewhat tedious scrawl must end.
I've gone into this long detail,

Because I saw your nerves were shaken With anxious fears lest I should fail

In this new, loyal, course I've taken. But, bless your heart! you need not doubtWe, FUDGES, know what we're about. Look round, and say if you can see A much more thriving family.

There's JACK, the Doctor-night and day
Hundreds of patients so besiege him,
You'd swear that all the rich and gay

Fell sick on purpose to oblige him.
And while they think, the precious ninnies,
He's counting o'er their pulse so steady,
The rogue but counts how many guineas

He's fobb'd, for that day's work, already. I'll ne'er forget th' old maid's alarm,

When, feeling thus Miss Sukey Flirt, he Said, as he dropp'd he shrivell'd arm, "Dama d bad this morning-only thirty!"

Your dowagers, too, every one,

So gen'rous are, when they call him in, That he might now retire upon

The rheumatisms of three old women. Then, whatsoe'er your ailments are,

He can so learnedly explain ye 'emYour cold, of course, is a catarrh,

Your headache is a hemi-cranium : His skill, too, in young ladies' lungs,

The grace with which, most mild of men, He begs them to put out their tongues,

Then bids them-put them in again: In short, there's nothing now like JACK!— Take all your doctors great and small, Of present times and ages back,

Dear Doctor FUDGE is worth them all.

So much for physic-then, in law too,
Counsellor TIM, to thee we bow;
Not one of us gives more eclat to

Th' immortal name of FUDGE than thou. Not to expatiate on the art

With which you play'd the patriot's part,
Till something good and snug should offer ;-
Like one, who, by the way he acts
Th' enlight'ning part of candle-snuffer,
The manager's keen eye attracts,
And is promoted thence by him
To strut in robes, like thee, my TIM!—
Who shall describe thy pow'rs of face,
Thy well-feed zeal in ev'ry case,
Or wrong or right-but ten times warmer
(As suits thy calling) in the former-

Ministerial career, took lessons three times a week from a celebrated music-master, in glee-singing.

1 How amply these two propensities of the Noble Lord would have been gratified among that ancient people of Etruria, who, as Aristotle tells us, used to whip their slaves once a year to the sound of flutes!

2 This Right Hon. Gentleman ought to give up his present alliance with Lord C., if upon no other principle than that which is inculcated in the following arrangement between two Ladies of Fashion: