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This is no new inconvenience ; for, The Concord road, for instance (I, for under date, 3d June, 1745, General Pep
one, perell wrote thus to Governor Shirley from Most gin'lly ollers call it John Bull's Run), Louisbourg : “What your Excellency ob- The field o' Lexin'ton where England tried serves of the army's being made acquainted The fastest colours thet she ever dyed, with any plans proposed, until ready to be An' Concord Bridge, thet Davis, when he put in execution, has always been disagree
came, able to me, and I have given many cautions Found was the bee-line track to heaven an' relating to it. But when your Excellency fame, considers that our Council of War consists Ez all roads be by natur', soul of more than twenty members, I am persuaded Don't sneak thru shun-pikes so 's to save you will think it impossible for me to hinder
the toll. it, if any of them will persist in communicating to inferior officers and soldiers what They're 'most too fur away, take too much ought to be kept secret. I am informed
time that the Boston newspapers are filled with To visit of'en, ef it ain't in rhyme ; paragraphs from private letters relating to But the’'s a walk thet 's hendier, a sight, the expedition. Will your Excellency per- An’suits me fust-rate of a winter's night, mit me to say I think it may be of ill con- I mean the round whale's-back o' Prospect sequence ? Would it not be convenient, if
Hill. your Excellency should forbid the Printers' I love to l'iter there while night grows inserting such news?” Verily, if tempora still, mutantur, we may question the et nos mu- An' in the twinklin' villages about, tamur in illis ; and if tongues be leaky, it Fust here, then there, the well-saved lights will need all hands at the pumps to save the Ship of State. Our history dotes and An'
nary sound but watch - dogs' false repeats itself. If Sassycus (rather than
alarms, Alcibiades) find a parallel in Beauregard, Or muffled cock-crows from the drowsy so Weakwash, as he is called by the brave
farms, Lieutenant Lion Gardiner, need not seek Where some wise rooster (men act jest far among our own Sachems for his anti
thet way) type.
Stands to 't thet moon-rise is the break o' With respect,
day : Your ob' humble serv',
(So Mister Seward sticks a three-months' HOMER WILBUR, A. M.
Where the war'd oughto eend, then tries I LOVE to start out arter night's begun,
agin ; An' all the chores about the farm are done, My gran’ther's rule was safer 'n 't is to The critters milked an' foddered, gates shet fast,
Don't never prophesy — onless ye know.) Tools cleaned aginst to-morrer, supper
I love to muse there till it kind o' seems past,
Ez ef the world went eddyin' off in dreams; An' Nancy darnin' by her ker’sene lamp, - The northwest wind thet twitches at my I love, I say, to start upon a tramp,
baird To shake the kinkles out o' back an' legs, Blows out o' sturdier days not easy scared, An' kind o’rack my life off from the dregs An' the same moon thet this December Thet 's apt to settle in the buttery-hutch
shines Of folks thet foller in one rut too much : Starts out the tents an' booths o’ Putnam's Hard work is good an’ wholesome, past all
The rail-fence posts, acrost the hill thet But 't ain't so, ef the mind gits tuckered
Turn ghosts o' sogers should'rin' ghosts o' Now, bein' born in Middlesex, you know,
guns ; There's certio spots where I like best to Ez wheels the sentry, glints a flash o' light,
Along the firelock won at Concord Fight,
An', 'twixt the silences, now fur, now nigh,
THE MONIMENT Rings the sharp chellenge, hums the low reply.
You know them envys thet the Rebbles
sent, Ez I
was settin' so, it warn't long sence, Au' Cap'n Wilkes he borried o' the Trent ? Mixin' the puffict with the present tense, I heerd two voices som'ers in the air, Though, ef I was to die, I can't tell where: Wut I they ha'n't hanged 'em? Then their Voices I call 'em: 't was a kind o' sough
wits is gone! Like pine-trees thet the wind 's agetu'rin' Thet 's the sure way to make a goose a through ;
swan! An', fact, I thought it was the wind a spell, Then some misdoubted, could n't fairly tell, Fust sure, then not, jest as you hold an eel, No : England she would hev 'em, Fee, Faw, I knowed, an' did n't, - fin'lly seemed to
Fum ! feel
(Ez though she hed n't fools enough to 'T was Concord Bridge a talkin' off to kill
Bunker's Hill ;
Hev they? Wal, by heaven,
Thet's the wust news I 've heerd sence THE BRIDGE
Seventy-seven! Wal, neighbor, tell us wut 's turned up By George, I meant to say, though I dethet 's new ?
clare You 're younger 'n I be, - nigher Bos- It’s ’most enough to make a deacon swear.
ton, tu : An' down to Boston, ef you take their showin',
Now don't go off half-cock : folks never Wut they don't know ain't hardly wuth gains the knowin'.
By usin' pepper-sarse instid o' brains. There's sunthin' goin' on, I know : las' | Come, neighbor, you don't understan'
night The British sogers killed in our gret fight (Nigh fifty year they hed n't stirredonor
How? Hey ? spoke)
Not understan'? Why, wut 's to hender, Made sech a coil you 'd thought a dam hed broke :
Must I go huntin' round to find a chap Why, one he up an' beat a revellee
To tell me when my face hez hed a slap ? With his own crossbones on a holler tree, Till all the graveyards swarmed out like a hive
See here : the British they found out a With faces I hain't seen sence Seventy
In Cap'n Wilkes's readin' o' the law : Wut is the news ? 'T ain't good, or they'd (They make all laws, you know, an’so, o' be cheerin'.
course, Speak slow an' clear, for I'm some hard o' It's nateral they should understan' their hearin'.
He'd oughto ha' took the vessel into port, THE MONIMENT
An' hed her sot on by a reg'lar court; I don't know hardly ef it's good or bad, She was a mail-ship, an' a steamer, tu,
An' thet, they say, hez changed the pint o'
view, At wust, it can't be wus than wut we've Coz the old practice, bein' meant for sails, bad.
Ef tried upon a steamer, kind o' fails ;
You may take out despatches, but you
mus' n't Take nary man —
An' so we can't Distinguish 'twixt You ought n't an' You
sha'n't! She jedges by herself ; she's no idear How 't stiddies folks to give 'em their fair
sheer : The odds 'twixt her an' us is plain 's a
steeple, Her People's turned to Mob, our Mob's
You mean to say, you dus' n't ! Changed pint o'view! No, no, - it 's
overboard With law an' gospel, when their ox is
gored ! I tell ye, England's law, on sea an' land, Hez ollers ben, “ I've gut the heaviest hand.” Take nary man? Fine preachin' from her
lips ! Why, she hez taken hunderds from our
ships, An' would agin, an’swear she had a right to, Ef we warn't strong enough to be per
lite to. Of all the sarse thet I can call to mind, England doos make the most onpleasant
kind : It 's you 're the sinner ollers, she's the
saint ; Wut's good's all English, all thet is n't
ain't ; Wut profits her is ollers right an' just, An' ef you don't read Scriptur so, you
must; She 's praised herself ontil she fairly thinks There ain't no light in Natur when she
winks ; Hain't she the Ten Comman'ments in her
She's riled jes' now –
THE BRIDGE Plain proof her cause ain't strong, The one thet fust gits mad 's 'most ollers
wrong. Why, sence she helped in lickin' Nap the
Fust, An' pricked a bubble jest agoin' to bust, With Rooshy, Prooshy, Austry, all assist
in', Th' ain't nut a face but wut she's shook her
fist in, Ez though she done it all, an' ten times
more, An' nothin' never hed gut done afore, Nor never could agin, 'thout she wuz spliced On to one eend an' gin th' old airth a hoist. She is some punkins, thet I wun't deny, (For ain't she some related to you 'n' I ?) But there's a few small intrists here be
low Outside the counter o' John Bull an' Co, An' though they can't conceit how't should I guess the Lord druv down Creation's
spiles 'thout no gret helpin' from the British Isles, An' could contrive to keep things pooty
stiff Ef they withdrawed from business in a
Could the world stir 'thout she went, tu,
ez nus ? She ain't like other mortals, thet 's a fact : She never stopped the habus-corpus act, Nor specie payments, nor she never yet Cut down the int'rest on her public debt ; She don't put down rebellions, lets 'em
breed, An''s ollers willin' Ireland should secede ; She 's all thet 's honest, honnable, an' fair, An' when the vartoos died they made her
I ha'n't no patience with sech swellin' fel
Think God can't forge 'thout them to blow
Wal, wal, two wrongs don't never make a
right; Ef we're mistaken, own up, an' don't
fight : For gracious' sake, ha'n't we enough to du 'thout gettin' up a fight with England, tu ? She thinks we 're rabble-rid
THE MONIMENT You ’re ollers quick to set your back aridge, Though 't suits a tom-cat more ’n a sober
Don't you git het : they thought the thing
was planned ; They 'll cool off when they come to under
Soon ez we've proved thet we're a-goin' to
lick. She an' Columby's gut to be fas’ friends: For the world prospers by their privit ends: 'T would put the clock back all o'fifty years Ef they should fall together by the ears.
THE BRIDGE I 'gree to thet; she's nigh us to wat
France is ; But then she'll hev to make the fust ad
vances ; We've gut pride, tu, an' gut it by good
rights, An' ketch me stoopin' to pick up the mites O'condescension she 'll be lettin' fall When she finds out we ain't dead arter all ! I tell ye wut, it takes more 'n one good week Afore my nose forgits it 's hed a tweak.
Ef thet 's wut you expect, you 'll hev to wait ;
goes ; Remember (no, you can't), when I was
reared, God save the King was all the tune you
heerd : But it's enough to turn Wachuset roun' This stumpin' fellers when you think they ’re down.
THE MONIMENT But, neighbor, ef they prove their claim at
law, The best way is to settle, an' not jaw. An'don't le''s mutter 'bout the awfle bricks We'll give 'em, ef we ketch 'em in a fix : That 'ere 's most frequently the kin' o' talk Of critters can't be kicked to toe the chalk; Your “You 'll see nex' time !" an' “ Look
out bumby!” 'Most ollers ends in eatin' umble-pie. 'T wun't pay to scringe to England : will it
pay To fear thet meaner bully, old “ They 'll Suppose they du say: words are dreffle
bores, But they ain't quite so bad ez seventy-fours. Wut England wants is jest a wedge to fit Where it'll help to widen out our split : She's found her wedge, an' 't ain't for us to
She 'll come out right bumby, thet I'll
engage, Soon ez she gits to seein' we're of age ; This talkin' down o'hers ain't wuth a fuss ; It's nat’ral ez nut likin' 't is to us; Ef we ’re agoin' to prove we be growed-up, 'T wun't be by barkin' like a tarrier pup, But turnin' to an' makin' things ez good Ez wut we're ollers braggin' that we could; We're boun’ to be good friends, an' so
we'd oughto, In spite of all the fools both sides the water.
I b'lieve thet's so; but hearken in your
ear, I'm older 'n you, - Peace wun't keep house
with Fear : Ef you want peace, the thing you ’ve gut tu
du Is jes' to show you 're up to fightin', tu. I recollect how sailors' rights was won, Yard locked in yard, hot gun-lip kissin'
gun : Why, afore thet, John Bull sot up thet he Hed gut a kind o' mortgage on the sea; You'd thought he held by Gran'ther
Adam's will, An'ef you knuckle down, he 'll think so still. Better thet all our ships an' all their crews Should sink to rot in ocean's dreamless ooze, Each torn flag wavin' chellenge ez it went, An' each dumb gun a brave man's moni
Than seek sech peace ez only cowards You 've gut to be in airnest, ef you fight;
Why, two thirds o'the Rebbles 'ould cut Give me the peace of dead men or of brave!
Ef they once thought thet Guv'ment meant THE MONIMENT
to hurt; I say, ole boy, it ain't the Glorious Fourth: An' I du wish our Gin’rals hed in mind You'd oughto larned 'fore this wut talk wuz The folks in front more than the folks beworth.
hind; It ain't our nose thet gits put out o' jint; You wun't do much ontil you think it 's God, It's England thet gives up her dearest pint. An' not constitoounts, thet holds the rod; We've gut, I tell ye now, enough to du We want some more o' Gideon's sword, I In our own fem'ly fight, afore we 're thru.
jedge, I hoped, las' spring, jest arter Sumter's For proclamations ha'n't no gret of edge; shame,
There 's nothin' for a cancer but the knife, When every flag-staff flapped its tethered Onless you set by 't more than by your life. flame,
I've seen hard times; I see a war begun An' all the people, startled from their Thet folks thet love their bellies never 'd doubt,
won; Come must'rin' to the flag with sech a Pharo's lean kine hung on for seven long shout,
year; I hoped to see things settled 'fore this fall, But when 't was done, we did n't count it The Rebbles licked, Jeff Davis hanged, an' dear; all;
Why, law an' order, honor, civil right, Then come Bull Run, an’sence then I've Ef they ain't wuth it, wut is wuth a fight? ben waitin'
I'm older 'n you: the plough, the axe, the Like boys in Jennooary thaw for skatin',
mill, Nothin' to du but watch my shadder's trace All kin's o labor an' all kin's o’skill, Swing, like a ship at anchor, roun’my base, Would be a rabbit in a wile-cat's claw, With daylight's flood an' ebb: it's gittin' Ef 't warn't for thet slow critter, 'stablished slow,
law; An’I'most think we 'd better let 'em go. Onsettle thet, an' all the world goes whiz, I tell ye wut, this war 's a-goin' to cost- A screw 's gut loose in everythin' there is:
Good buttresses once settled, don't you fret THE BRIDGE
An' stir 'em; take a bridge's word for thet! An' I tell you it wun't be money lost; Young folks are smart, but all ain't good Taxes milks dry, but, neighbor, you 'll allow
thet 's new; Thet havin' things onsettled kills the cow: I guess the gran’thers they knowed sunthin', We've gut to fix this thing for good an'all;
tu. It's no use buildin' wut 's a-goin' to fall.
THE MONIMENT I'm older 'n you, an' I've seen things an' men,
Amen to thet! build sure in the beginnin': An' my experunce, — tell ye wut it 's ben: An' then don't never tech the underpinnin': Folks thet worked thorough was the ones Th' older a guv'ment is, the better 't suits; thet thriv,
New ones hunt folks's corns out like new But bad work follers ye ez long 's ye live;
boots: You can't git red on 't; jest ez sure ez sin, Change jes' for change, is like them big It 's ollers askin' to be done agin:
hotels Ef we should part, it would n't be a week Where they shift plates, an' let ye 'Fore your soft-soddered peace would spring smells. aleak.
THE BRIDGE We've turned our cuffs up, but, to put her thru,
Wal, don't give up afore the ship goes We must git mad an' off with jackets, tu;
down: T wun't du to think thet killin' ain't per- It 's a stiff gale, but Providence wun't lite,